In a Wedding Chapel Not so Far Away
by Twissie
Summary: Chandler from Freinds (I guess this story should be in the crossover area.. but it's mainly Star Wars) are wedding Monica... and what has that to with Star Wars you wonder... Then read on.. You'll be surprised! (It's really NOT what you think!)


Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or the idea in this story… (Hm… I'm just writing it ***lol***)My friend gave me the challenge so I guess it's her idea. Thank you Grethe! =) And I'm not making any money off of this, and I don't intend to do so… So please don't sue me or anything nasty like that… Thank you for your attention, now get on with the story!

The challenge looked more or less like this:

*The story has to be a Star Wars story. You can use any character you want but Obi-Wan, Darth Maul, Yoda and Chandler (from Friends) has to be in it.

*They have to play a childrens game.

*Some kind of vehicle has to crash.

*Add a beach ball and you have your story!

So read on and beware, you are heading into strange lands.

In a wedding chapel not so far away in New York.

"Hey Chandler, good luck… It's finally happening, he buddy?" Joey gave Chandler a friendly pat on the shoulder.

Chandler smiled… He was nervous… he was really, really nervous… He was absolutely sure that he hadn't been more nervous in his life… This was the day he was marrying Monica. It was time… _This is it_, he thought. He went inside the church, and stood there in front of the whole crowd of people who had come to see if this really was happening. _Now couldn't they just start the music already?_ Just as he thought that thought, a sound rang loudly from the organ. _Hey good… the music is starting, but hey wait… oh the theme from Star Wars, wait… this must be a mistake… _He just stood there; hoping people would laugh and think that it was a joke… But actually, it seemed, as the people there didn't even care. Suddenly the doors opened. Monica came in led by her father, and she wore this absolutely beautiful gown. _Yes, yes I'm definitely doing the right thing,_ Chandler thought. The priest started talking, Chandler weren't paying attention. He answered "I do" in the proper place and finally the priest said, "You may kiss the bride". Chandler removed the veil from Monica's face only to notice that this weren't Monica… Or maybe it was… It sure didn't look like Monica, but with all that white paint on her face, who could know? 

"Psst… Monica, is that you?" Chandler discretely whispered to the woman standing in front of him. 

"Monica? Who is she? I'm Amidala, remember? Come on silly, aren't you going to kiss me?"

"Ahhhhhhh!!!!" Screaming, Chandler ran out of the building, which turned out to be a totally different building than the church he went in to earlier this morning. 

"Oh great… Chandler you are not in Kansas anymore… Where am I? What's going on…" He stood outside the weird oval shaped building staring all around him. Everything was different. There were beautiful trees and weird plants, magnificent buildings and strange architectures. 

But Chandler hadn't got time to stand around and admire the beautiful buildings, he had to run away! And just as he thought, out of the chapel (or whatever he had just been inside of) came the girl in the wedding gown and a whole lot of other people running out after him! He started running as fast as he could down one of the bigger streets, but it didn't seem to be any traffic of any kind. Chandler became very tired… He started thinking that he really should have continued those early morning runs together with Monica. But no time for thinking now, he looked behind him and the folk running after him were right in his heels! Suddenly he hit something… no… More precisely he had run into something… Something with red and black skin, small horns on top of its head and black, funny looking clothes. 

"This is where your little run comes to an end", the menacing looking figure told Chandler. Chandler believed him…

Chandler didn't remember being taken from the street into a building, but when he woke up he were inside a building of some sort. He could hear voices outside of his room. It was a pretty simple room, it had a small, but very comfortable, bed, a very small completely square carpet and a small closet which he didn't want to open. It sounded like the voices had an argument, and Chandler believed it was about him.

"What did you say? He ran away from his own wedding? But he was going to marry the queen… Oh this is not good. And when he saw you he passed out… Maul are you being a little hard on him?", a loud clear voice rang out.

"Hard on him? Of course not… he can't do anything right. How can I be hard on him when he don't know anything?", a deep kind of scary, but strangely familiar voice said back. 

"Well, as long as he is doing his meditation and you keep on training him the best you can, even a moron like him can become a Jedi one day… I think", the first voice talked again.

"Do you doubt my teaching ability Obi-Wan?", the deep voice said again.

"No, of course not… I just… Oh never mind. We'd better go check on him. See how he's doing.", and with those words footsteps got closer to the door. Chandler didn't know what to do, so he just stood there in the middle of the room like any other moron would have done in his place. 

"Oh Chandler you're awake… How are you doing? Why did you run away?", the menacing looking man he had run into earlier asked him. But instead of answering any of these questions Chandler blurted out:" Oh my God! Oh my God! Darth Maul and Obi-Wan… I mean… Ray Park and Ewan McGregor!!! This is so cool! How did Monica know that I'm a Star Wars fan? Okey… Where are the hidden cameras? This is the best candid camera trick I've ever seen! Oh this is so cool!", Chandler jumped around the room looking for the hidden camera, but he couldn't seem to find one.

"Ehh… Obi-Wan… What the hell is he talking about?", Maul asked Obi-Wan.

"I have no idea… Maybe I was wrong… I don't think this guy have ANY chance what so ever to become a Jedi", Maul gave Obi-Wan a cheesy grin and said.

"I don't want to sound childish but… I TOLD YOU SO! Muahahahahaha…", Obi-Wan rolled his eyes and turned his attention back to Chandler again. 

"But… Aren't you guys supposed to be enemies? Hey… Obi didn't you kill Maul? He is supposed to be cut in half… Wow, where are your lightsabers… I've never seen a real prop before… Oh this is so great… Memo to myself... Remember to thank Monica for doing this", Chandler had stopped jumping around and stood completely still in the middle of the room again. Obi-Wan and Maul looked at each other. Enemies? Cut in half? Now they knew for sure. Maul's apprentice HAD gone mad. 

"Hey, hey… Chandler, what do you mean enemies? Don't you trust your master? Why haven't you told us earlier? I mean… I've been your master since your training with Yoda was finished when you were five… And now, NOW you tell me that you don't trust me… And on top of that you call me an enemy! And what do you mean cut in half???", Maul walked slowly towards Chandler while pointing menacingly at him. Chandler didn't understand this. As far as he could tell this could be explained in two ways. Either the people behind the candid camera show took this joke a little far or he had passed out during his wedding ceremony and was having a really weird dream… But Chandler didn't care if it was a stupid joke… He didn't want to make a fool out of himself and let Monica have something to laugh about the next couple of years… Why not just spoil the whole thing… Hehe fun.

"Well… Call me stupid if I'm wrong but, everyone who saw Episode one knows what I'm talking about. That you were Darth Sidious apprentice, and you killed Qui-Gon and then Obi-Wan cut you in half and you fell down a shaft.", Obi-Wan and Maul looked at each other with rised eye brows. 

"I think your apprentice may have suffered a severe case of memory loss. Let's take him to Yoda. Maybe we shouldn't have brought him from Naboo to Couroscouant while he was unconscious…", Obi-Wan suggested, Maul didn't answer he just nodded. They took an arm each and dragged Chandler with them out of the room and down a narrow hallway. 

Chandler now strongly believed that he was dreaming. Because he now stood face to face with Yoda, his favourite character from Star Wars. 

"Hmm… remember anything you say you don't hmm?", Chandler still didn't understand what he was supposed to be remembering, so he just shook his head. 

"A cure for that I have! A little it will help at least", the green faced figure told Chandler as Yoda showed him an old newspaper. 

"Play the newspaper game we will", he said and gave Chandler a challenging look. Darth Maul and Obi-Wan rolled their eyes.

"Hmm… the rules Obi-Wan explain him ", Yoda gave Obi-Wan the newspaper.

"Okey, I guess I'll have to explain the rules… We'llallsitinaring,andtheonewiththenewspaperwillbeplacedinthemiddleofthecircle.Theonewiththenewspaperhastohitoneofthepeople,sittingaroundhim,withthenewspaper.Butthepersontheonewiththenewspaperisaimingforcandefendhim/herselfbyshoutingoutanothernameofanotherpersonsittinginthering,sotheonewiththenewspaperhavetohitthatpersonwhosenamegotshoutedoutinstead.Andtheonewiththenewspaperhastobereallyfastandrememberthenamestogettohitanyone.Thepersonwhogetshitbythenewspaperhastotradeplaceswiththeonewiththenewspaper.", Obi-Wan spoke really fast and explained with his whole body by jumping up and down and repeatedly hitting Darth Maul on the head with the newspaper. And before Chandler could say Force a whole bunch of people he had never seen before came into the room. Although there were one boy who seemed very familiar… 

"Oh… oh… Anakin… hehehe Luuuuooookkkeee… Iiii'me yooouuuurrrrr fatttthheeerr…", Chandler made the best Darth Vader voice he could, still believing this was a candid camera joke. Everyone around him got really quiet and looked at him… 

"Oki… that was fun, who wants to play the newspaper game?", Chandler sat down on the floor and kept his mouth shut for pretty much the rest of the night (except while shouting out names to keep him from having to hit people on the head with an old newspaper).

After an extremely embarrassing and confusing day, Chandler went to sleep in his room. He had the strangest dream he had ever had, and that didn't comfort him at all. When Chandler woke up, Darth Maul was already standing in his room. That reminded Chandler of his old roommate and he jumped out of the bed. 

"Oh sorry… Did I frighten you Chandler? Well… It's a good thing that you are awake now. You are coming with me to visit Amidala and talk to her about your problems. And give her an explanation on why you ran away from your wedding. Which, by the way, was not the smartest thing you could have done at that time." Chandler started getting ready for a brand new weird day. He wasn't looking forward to talk to that Amidala girl again. And she seemed so much younger than he did… How could she get married now? Darth Maul had disappeared from Chandler's room and Chandler sneak out in the hallway. Chandler caught a glimpse of Darth Maul, but what was he doing? It looked like he were dancing… And for some strange reason it actually reminded Chandler of something… hmm. But he couldn't think up what it was it reminded him of. So he decided to follow the dancing Darth Maul around. And then he suddenly remembered it…

"The groove, beware of the groove… The groove…." Chandler started laughing. Darth Maul turned around with and weird expression on his face.

"What was that?" He said fiercely to Chandler.

"Oh just something from The Emperors New Groove" He answered.

"What????? Oh… Never mind that now… Let's go to the space taxi… It's actually waiting for us" And with that Chandler and Darth Maul left the Jedi temple and got inside the space taxi. 

They drove or flew for quite a long time and Chandler grew bored. He spotted something underneath the driver's seat. It looked like a beach ball, only this one was grey and probably not as fun to play with. But Chandler took it out anyway, he then realised that it was a rather large vomit bag or something because it was open in the top. Chandler snirped it at the top and started blowing air into it. He wanted to see if Darth maul or Ray Park, or whomever that guy was, was as easily frightened as everyone else. When the bag was big enough, Chandler held it out before him just beside Darth Maul's ear. Chandler hit the bag as hard as he could, and yup… the darn thing blew with a big kaboom, but Darth Maul didn't budge. 

"Hm… That's weird… Oh well, maybe this guy has a severe HEARING PROBLEM!", Chandler yelled the two last words so loud that it probably would have burst your eardrums, so if your ears are bleeding now, please step away from the computer, run to the nearest bathroom and cool them down with water.. (Don't pour water IN your ears though!). But anyway… Back to the story, Darth Maul still didn't move. Chandler wanted to grab his shoulder and shake Darth Maul, just to check if he still were alive. But as he tried to do so, his hand hit something hard… Oh no… glass, or something, between the backseat and the front seats… How irritating… Oh well. And of course, they were soundproof. Chandler started rubbing his face up against the glass, making funny faces at the two persons sitting in front of him minding their own business. But suddenly Darth Maul turned around, and pressed a button which made the glass go down, that led to a lot of things… Chandler tumbled into the front seats knocking over a whole bunch of buttons, levers, switches and so on and so forth, that made the space-taxi whirl out of control… Chandler was screaming, the driver was screaming, a whole bunch of alien people on a near by spacecraft was screaming and Darth Maul… well he just sat there with his arms crossed and a menacing looking smile upon his face. The driver didn't seem to know what to do and they crashed into a landing pod, giving the pod a whole new look (the taxi too I guess…). They got out; Darth Maul looked at Chandler, shook his head and walked away.

"Don't leave me this way!", Chandler called out to Darth Maul and immediately wondered where the hell THAT came from.

"I won't survive, without you're sharp horns, oh Darth… Don't leave me this way…" Chandler continued. Darth Maul gave Chandler a weird look, turned around and said: "You'd think that people would have had enough of silly child pranks", Chandler answered: "I look around me and see it isn't so… hehe no", Darth Maul continued looking at Chandler and said: "Some people want to fill the world with silly child pranks", Chandler immediately replied: "Well, what's wrong with that? I'd like to know… Cause here I go again…" Chandler took a deep breath and stopped… What was he going to do? There weren't anything around that he could use to make a prank on Darth Maul, so he jumped on Darth Maul's back and covered Darth Maul's eyes and said: "May the Force lift us up where we belong, where spaceships fly so very high…", Darth Maul threw Chandler off his back and said: "The Force makes us act like we are fools, throwing our lives away for one happy day", Chandler got really excited and said: "We could be heroes, if we run away!". Chandler looked at Darth Maul and Darth Maul looked at Chandler… Chandler could see that Darth Maul were blushing, that actually bothered him, but what a cool idea… What if he and Darth Maul joined forces and set out to try to expand their universe… "Okey, come on you crazy guy… Let's see if we can find a vehicle we can steal", and so hand in hand (that bothered Chandler a lot) they set out through the sunset and may never be seen again… Ahh… don't you just love a happy ending? But… Was it really a happy ending? The Jedi lost Darth Maul (a major loss!), Chandler lost Monica (and Amidala!), and Ewan McGregor didn't even get to perform his part of Elephant Love Medley taken from Moulin Rouge (The best film ever!), and… How did Chandler get to the Star Wars galaxy? (I'd sure like to know)… Okay… I'll stop now… 

THE END


End file.
